There is great power in patience. Not only for ourselves, but for the people around us. As adults, we go through life with the expectation of ‘it needs to happen right now’. That’s fine and dandy for most of us, but it becomes difficult with that pressure to sometimes identify when we need to
step back and pause.
When we watch toddlers learning to walk, we have the expectation of their ability to walk, but we never begin with a time frame. We’re patient for them. Why can’t we do that for others?
Even when they grow up and become teenagers, we still create a space of learning that they are able to find their own way in life. Applying patience in their learning means they can make it their own instead of having forced upon them.
I know that in the last 12 months I haven’t always applied patience to myself.
When finishing up at my previous job and whilst still looking for a new job I felt rushed, with a sense of urgency that if I didn’t meet my own deadlines, I was a failure. As this feeling of dread and overwhelm crept up on me I paused and began to think it through. Looking back at all the steps that
I had taken to even get there I could see I had already crammed so many things into my life and still achieved them. This desire I had created to be three steps ahead of where I was didn’t factor in the 20 achievements already made.
This perspective changed everything. I wasn’t sending out a vibe of panic any more. Instead, a calm confidence went forward before me and helped me find a new pathway I hadn’t seen amongst my stress.
Patience applies strongly when in a relationship. I am totally sure that everyone has had their own experience to test that patience. However, when I think of my relationships and how they tie together with all this talk of patience, only one moment comes to mind.
My partner, at the time, and I were driving in the car. During this trip, I could sense that something was off. Following my gut feeling, I enquired and received a response I knew was covering their true feelings. I didn’t chase this any further, because I could already feel the emotional walls going up. We sat in silence for 10 minutes, but suddenly my partner blurted out everything on her mind and showed how she was really feeling. In that moment I knew I wouldn’t have received that openness if I asked more questions, it was only the space of patience that allowed for this.
My challenge for you is to find one moment a week where you physically or mentally stop yourself and ask ‘how would I treat this situation if I was patient?’.